BONNIE BELLAIRS-REED
MOTHER | WIDOW
LIFE'S UNEXPECTED JOURNEY
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THE THINGS
NO ONE TELLS YOU
about IN WIDOWHOOD
No one really prepares you for what widowhood actually feels like.
It's more than missing the person you lost. It can change how you think, how you feel, how you see yourself, your relationships, and how you imagine your future.
And sometimes you wonder, “What is wrong with me?"
The answer, NOTHING!
Widow Brain.
Your brain feels different
You have a hard time concentrating.
You forget things.
You're exhausted.
People Don't Always Understand.
Unless they too have lost their spouse, they don't understand.
They think you are ok, or strong when on the inside, you are a wreck, and you so feel alone.
You Don't Feel Like Yourself
You were a couple, now you're figuring out who you are on your own.
Your identity, confidence, routines and plans may have changed. You don't know who you are without them.
The Future Feels Unfamiliar.
You didn't plan this life.
You didn't choose this journey.
You probably don't know what you want anymore, or even what you want your life to look like.
And that's ok. You don't have to figure it all out today.
There Is No Right Or Wrong Way To Grieve
Your grief is yours.
You may cry every day.
You may not cry at all.
You may want to talk about them constantly.
You may need days when you don't talk about them.
You may have a good day and feel guilty about it.
None of it means you're doing grief wrong.
There is no timeline. There is no checklist. There is no “right” way.